Finding love, getting married and settling down are milestones that many of us take as a given. Of course we’ll end up married in the end! And of course we’ll be with our partner until we’re old and gray! Unfortunately, it isn’t quite that simple—but the media would have us believe otherwise.
Even when films take into account that couples fight and people grow apart, the prevailing theme is that everyone ends up coupled in the end. Breakups tend to be a means to new relationships. Couples live happily ever after. Soulmates break up, only to be reunited by the forces of fate in the end. There’s one special person for everyone, and life with that person is always positive, fulfilling and predestined.
Talk to a relationship expert, though, and you’ll begin to learn that things aren’t so black and white. Here are a few things movies get wrong about romantic relationships.
Your Partner Will Always Treat You The Way You Want Them To
While you should never accept violence or abuse (physical or emotional) from a partner, expecting that your partner will always put you before him or herself is sure to lead to disappointment. Human beings are, well, only human. Part of a long-term, loving relationship is accepting the other person’s flaws. Obviously, your partner should take your feelings into account, but failing to act lovingly once in awhile is inevitable.
And besides, asking your partner to change simply for your benefit can be a selfish request on your part.
“Partners who work together to strengthen their relationships with trust and communication will many times notice healthy, natural changes that come as products of cooperation instead of co-opting one another,” says New York Life Coaching.